A discussion on civility at Les Blogs turned less than civil when the blogosphere’s (apologies to The Optimist) self-proclaimed asshole Ben Metcalf called “bullshit” (literally) on Six Apart co-founder Mena Trott in a backchannel discussion during her presentation.

After noticing Ben’s comments on the very active backchannel (an IRC channel set up for the discussion), Mena singled him out of the crowd and started a slightly heated exchange between the two bloggers.

Mena was calling for civility in blogging in her speech, and used the conference backchannel as an example of how, couched in anonymity, people in online environments are less civil than they would be in a face-to-face situation (she also called out Jeremy Zawodny for his contribution to uncivil blogologue). As I understand it (and I wasn’t there), Ben began commenting on this on the backchannel itself.

Ben essentially said that a blog conference is not the best venue for a plea for civility, and shared his feelings of being patronized by Mena. If you’re feeling victimized by other bloggers and blog readers, “roll with the punches,” Ben said.

The exchange apparently did not lead to any long term anomosity–according to Ben, they came to terms and shook hands after the session.

I just have a few thoughts to share on this whole exchange.

First, although I think Ben probably got just a little too excited about the topic, and certainly didn’t add to the civility of the session, I have to agree with him in principle. The blogosphere (oh I must be driving Terry mad by now) wouldn’t have become what it is if everyone walked around with kid gloves saying “excuse me, pardon me” like good Canadians or proper Brits. The blogosphere–if you’ll allow me to continue to stereotype both bloggers and cultures–is loud, like Americans, and brash, like the French.

Second, when I dropped the anonymity on our corporate blog and started blogging under my own name (and I assume this applies to our other bloggers), I’m not sure it meant that I was any more polite than before. In fact, I make it a point not to blog anything I wouldn’t say in person, and I’m of the opinion that many other bloggers hold the same view.

The problem with blogging, and with mediated communication in general, is that it is a poor substitute for real, face-to-face interaction. And text-based communication is the worst of all of them. Our brains are still wired for F2F interpersonal communication, and are not equipped to read the visual and auditory clues that normally warn us of potential subtext.

Backchannels are an excellent tool–I use them (IM specifically) in phone interviews when I cannot be next to my client to prompt him or her as needed. And whether the backchannel is a comment page or a phone call, the feedback is critical to effective communication, whether that feedback is positive, constructive or just downright angry.

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